Category Archives: Personal Essays

Why Do Words Count?

Words are the connective tissue between idea and expression. We tell ourselves about our ideas with words, using them to move from vague conjecture to clear concept.
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The After Days

Projects have always been a way of life for the Purls. Sometimes a bane, sometimes a boon, projects define our time and express our various core purposes. That’s what I’ll miss the most, I think—that I won’t get to do the next project with Mom.
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A Year for Mom: The Big Day

The Purl Family “A Year for Mom” are posts written the year of my mother’s illness and her passing. It had started as one of Mom’s bright ideas. Though she and Pere had been unable to fly to California to see my sister Linda perform the remarkable one-woman show The Year of Magical Thinking, she imagined that, somehow, the show could come to her. Read more
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Step-Mothering is All Heart

Amelia-Mara-cropOne of my favorite roles in life is that of step-mother. Any more than one can plan or train for motherhood, one can’t schedule the unexpected eventually of becoming a step-parent. The job comes with its own prickly difficulties, but also with a series of gifts that continue to leave me, by turns, breathless and grateful. Read more
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God-Mothering from the Heart

Mara-Sami-graduation-crop Nothing could have been a greater honor than my friend's request that I be her baby's God-mother. We didn't know exactly what that might mean, as this special relationship would occur without religious affiliation. But since Erin and I refer to one another as spiritual sisters, it made perfect sense that I'd be involved in the spiritual life of her daughter. Read more
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A Year for Mom: January Foreshadows

Purl family Xmas photo 2012 Broadmoor“A Year for Mom” is a collection of posts written during 2013, the year of my mother’s final illness and of her passing. Some of the most heartfelt and extraordinary communications I’ve ever sent or received took place during this challenging year. I feel I learned so much that ultimately it was as much a year of gain as of loss. Many of my friends and readers have expressed a wish that I share my experiences. These personal moments are shared . . . from my heart.

My family all had a fabulous Whirl-Purl of a holiday season. I’m sure you’ve had years like this.… Read more

Posted in AHA Moments, Authenticity, Family, Family values, Gratitude, head and heart connection, Heart, Intuition, Live Your Best Life, Love, Mara Purl, Personal Essays, relationships, self-growth, Transformation, transformation through AHA moments | Tagged | 1 Comment

Whales’ Tales by the Dock of the Bay

Whale TailWriting is tough. It takes hours, weeks, months, years of solitude and focus. It requires “killing your darlings”—a writer-term for throwing out your favorite passages. It means wrestling with characters, struggling with storylines and remembering why the heck you’re putting yourself through all this torment in the first place. Then there are days when writing is just plain fun. For me, this often occurs when I get do a research field trip. I’m not entirely stupid about this—I choose favorite locations where my story just happens to take place. So I got to spend today in Morro Bay, one of the most delightful spots along California’s gorgeous Central Coast.… Read more

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Thanksgiving Fully Present

There are three things I love about Thanksgiving: the future, the past, and the present.

I think as a child I probably loved Thanksgiving because of the future—it meant Christmas was coming soon! It was also a holiday I anticipated with great joy because it meant we’d go visit Grandma Dorothy. She married my step-grandfather late in life—but just in time for my sister and me to adore her. The house she shared with “Daddy Bob” was a classic New England cottage in Waterbury, Connecticut. Cape-Cod-Blue with white trim, it stood erect despite the steep street that seemed to slice under it.… Read more

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Whose Mystery: Our Characters’ or Ours?

“Who done it?” Why do we get so caught up in solving mysteries? I have several readers—whose names I shall not divulge—who regularly e-mail me demanding to know who killed Chris, and whether she’s really dead, and when the crime will be solved! And I thought I was the only one who couldn’t sleep at night wondering about the characters of Milford-Haven!

My accomplished friend Margaret Coel  has equally marvelous stories about the obsessive nature of readers and how involved they become with her characters. At our event last weekend, she recounted some of the “helpful suggestions” she receives regarding her two protagonists, and how their life-dilemmas might be solved.… Read more

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When Women Gather

“Girls Night Out”—the phrase conjures images of everything from innocent fun to naughty pleasures. But the realities of what women do when they get together might be even more interesting.

Sometimes an evening with female colleagues is a rite of passage, a kind of test a woman can only pass by showing her authenticity. And sometimes a girlfriend-evening fulfills a basic need for time with those who share the same wiring.

Actually women have all kinds of ways of connecting. Sometimes the moments are brief—a quick lunch hour to catch up with a friend or get to know someone better. Other times it might be a special treat like afternoon tea—a chance to dress up and go someplace elegant, where the surroundings are inspiring enough to give us a fresh perspective.… Read more

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